Wednesday, July 24, 2013

The Challenge of Evolution

I'm writing this because I know someone out there maybe struggling with trying to change their life. I want you to know you are not alone.....

I would be lying if I said my evolution has been easy, "why go through this when I'm unsure of the outcome?" I ask myself often...For many years I was mentally sick, negative thoughts and speech is all that came out my mouth...It only intensified as I watched helplessly as those people in my life who were the most positive influences on me leave this life too soon. I had someone in my corner who encouraged me but I took them for granted and disregarded their positivity and forced my negativity upon them. I broke her heart repeatedly, caused mistrust, said foul, hurtful things, those things accumulated in her heart and stayed with her while I carried on selfishly carrying the burden of my pain. Over the years I hurt more than helped and drove folks away..for that I seek atonement...I realized that this outlook was leading me down a path of destruction, so I took the steps to change myself...


So why put myself through this? Because I owe it to my family to be better, they deserve better than they've been getting from me.I saw instant results in my change, things started to come together for me, but that pain remained...and I didn't address it. I have not lived up to my potential to be great, because I've held on to past hurts and threw it upon them instead of letting it go.I'm so sorry...but I carry on down this path to reclaim my life and help them through this time, I have done too much damage..

Don't rush it, don't force it, continue working on your development...become consistent with your actions...

I implore you, don't wait...its never too late to change who you are, if you've hurt someone you love, it will take time to heal. Things won't immediately turn around in hours, days, months, maybe YEARS, emotional damage is hard to fix but it can be fixed. Be strong, cry if you have to...but don't give up so easily...fight for what's important to you. It will be worth it in the end....

Peace

2 comments:

  1. Thanks man. We all go through it. Its hard to let go of things we have dont wrong in the past. We punish ourselves over and over when no other being does this. We should allow ourselves to forgive ourselves once we acknowledge our wrong doing and begin repenting for it... Congrats on the changes.

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  2. I appreciate you sharing this. I am definitely on that patj of recovery. Although it is a slow path, I am committed to see it through. Blessings to you and yours Mel!

    Trishamari34

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